Recently, Chris and I were invited to lunch by our friend Fatima* to meet a refugee family who had recently arrived from the Middle East.
When we arrived at her home we were surprised to see a diverse group of guests, with only a few looking Middle Eastern.
As the afternoon progressed, I learned that this gathering was a way for Fatima to honor those who had helped the refugees escape their country and find safety in Australia. We were there simply because we were friends.
Fatima* loves to cook and had prepared a wonderful meal. While enjoying the food, I found myself sitting next to a man who turned out to be a significant figure – a member of the upper house of our state parliament. For privacy, let’s call him Tom*.
Although Tom and I spoke the same language, we quickly realized that we weren’t really communicating. When he mentioned that Oregon, where I’m from, is a “progressive” state, I found myself unsure of how to respond. I wasn’t familiar with the specific political meaning of “progressive.”
Our conversation continued, and when Tom asked about my work, I told him that I’m a missionary. His immediate question was, “What denomination are you?”
Now, I’m proud of my church and denomination, but instead of focusing on that, I chose to share something deeper. I told Tom, “I’m a follower of Jesus.”
But as soon as the words left my mouth, I could see the confusion on his face. It was clear that my answer didn’t resonate with him, though it did give me a chance to share my story of coming to faith in Jesus and what it means to follow Him.
However, Tom’s response was, “So, which denomination are you part of?” It was as if he couldn’t get past the label, and in that moment, I realized I had failed to bridge the gap between our different understandings of religion.
Looking back, I see ways I could have navigated the conversation better. For example, I could have asked Tom what “progressive” meant to him in the political sense. Also, after sharing my journey, I could have invited him to share his by asking, “What has your spiritual journey been like?”
Conversations like this remind me how important it is to understand the categories and terms others use. It’s something I’m still learning, especially in our multicultural community.
How do you approach conversations with those around you? Are there concepts or terms you find challenging to navigate? I believe we can all grow in our ability to communicate more effectively.
Let’s pray together:
"Lord Jesus, You gave us the gift of speech and, at Babel, divided us into different languages. Help us to listen well to others, understanding both their words and the categories they use. Guide us in communicating effectively so that those we speak with may clearly understand and respond to the Gospel. Amen."
Have a great week seeking to communicate effectively with the people God sends your way.